Carryduff man’s plea for organ donors

Carryduff man’s plea for organ donors

3 December 2014

DESPITE his own loss Billy Kelly takes comfort from the fact that three people are alive and well because of his late wife. The Carryduff man made the difficult decision to donate her organs after she had a massive brain haemorrhage.

He believes it helped create meaning out of her tragic death and is pleased that not only the donor recipient’s lives have been transformed by the transplant, but also the lives of their family and loved ones.

Mr. Kelly decided to speak out about his experience as part of the South Eastern Trust’s Organ Donation Awareness Week.

Health chiefs say the issue is not something people think about every day, but with a real shortage of organs, more donors are desperately needed in the Trust area.

Around 200 people in Northern Ireland are on the transplant waiting list, with 15 of them sadly dying each year while waiting for an organ.

Although Mrs. Kelly hadn’t signed the organ donation register, as fate would have it a casual conversation with her husband shortly before she died three years ago left him sure of her wishes.

“It was amazing,” he said. “Almost to the day one week before Gertie died we were in the dining room looking at completing a car tax form and we looked at each and said, ‘Do you want to sign up to be a donor’?

“We simply said we have talked about this again and again and again, it is time we did something about it. Remarkably we didn’t.

“It had always been in my mind but it gave me an insight in Gertie’s mind.”

Mr. Kelly was referring to the option now available on road tax forms to sign up to the donor register — a recent government initiative to encourage more donors.

Despite support for organ donation being extremely high, less than a third of the Northern Ireland’s population is on the register. Also, only 55 per cent of families agree to donation going ahead if they are unaware of their loved one’s wishes.

With his wife in good health her sudden death at the age of 73 came as a terrible shock. Recalling how she collapsed in the bath, he said: “I literally had heard something falling. She was unconscious and never regained consciousness.”

Like her husband, Mrs. Kelly had a career in nursing and continued to work in the private sector during her busy retirement. Forty-four years married, they met while both working in Purdysburn.

And while Mr. Kelly had a familiarity with the hospital system he was no more prepared for the question of whether or not he wanted to donate his wife’s organs than anyone else.

During this “very traumatic” time he credits the specialist transplant nurse for being sensitive without pressure and walking him through the whole process.

“There is possibly some criticism that people are vulnerable at this time,” he said. “The time frame they have, however, is very limited. A lot of people do not feel up to that understandably.

“But it is in the aftermath that you get some sense of comfort.”

Mr. Kelly, himself on the organ donation register, acknowledges that some are “horrified” by the thought of donation or disagree with it from a religious standpoint. He points out, however, that all major faiths support it in principle. He is also keen to stress the respect he felt was shown to his wife throughout the process by the transplant nurse.

As a specialist team is quickly put in place for surgery he said he was pleased to be told the nurse would remain with his wife.

“They are there all night, you are getting that critical reassurance,” he said. “They are on the go all day.”

Mrs. Kelly’s organs have so far helped two men and one woman to live fuller lives. Although they maintain anonymity Mr. Kelly was touched to receive a letter from a teacher who received his wife’s liver donation, which was passed on by agreement via the NHS.

“She said in the letter, ‘I have been struggling for nearly two years to put into words what this has meant to me and my family’.

“This woman is now doing very well. It really is very important to know the worth of what you have done.

“After about a year the service doesn’t usually send any more letters. I said that I would be saddened by that so they have agreed to send me more.”

Ultimately Mr. Kelly hopes those reading this will stop and have that conversation about what to do about organ donation with their loved ones.

“Eighty-four per cent of the Northern Ireland population are in support or organ donation, but only 55 per cent of families agree to donation if they are unaware of love ones wishes,” he stressed.

“Only 32 per cent of the Northern Ireland population have signed the NHS donor registration — 84 per cent think it’s a great idea.”

Making their own appeals during Organ Donation Awareness Week, Dr. John McAteer, the South Eastern Trust’s clinical lead for organ donation, said: “If you are one of the few people who are suitable for organ donation then you can transform and save up to nine lives.”

The Trust’s specialist nurse for organ donation, Heather Savage, said people can indicate their wishes in a number of ways, such as telling a relative or close friend, by carrying an organ donor card or recording their wishes on the NHS Organ Donor Register.

“Putting your name on the NHS Organ Donor Register makes it easier for the NHS to establish your wishes and for those closest to you in life to follow them,” she said.

The health trust has created a video to raise awareness of the importance of organ donation and can be viewed at www.setrust.hscni.net/services/organdonation. To sign the

NHS organ donor register log on at www.organdonationni.info. Further information is also available by contacting Heather on 028 9041 1470 or on email at heather. savage@setrust. hscni.net.