Crudginton takes the Hill and Dale honours at Tollymore outing

23 April 2025

IN the famous words of Whitesnake, “here I go again …..”; the second race of the Hill and Dale series, which just seems to be growing exponentially haleor getting bigger and bigger in old money.

2024 witnessed 295 avid Hill and Dale runners complete the course with an increase of 107 more “lunatics” in 2025 - a record 402 took to the line for a trip around Tollymore and a jaunt up a mountain with no name. At the finish, a few names were suggested for the aforementioned hill, but none could be printed.

Once again, we were blessed with a clear dry day, blue skies and sunshine - 24 hours later it would be a very different story and the fell running gods were certainly on our side. Let’s hope this is the trend for every Thursday evening.

First things first - course to be marked. Race Director had assigned the task to what only can be described as a cast from the Wizard of Oz - Prophet of course was the “Tin Man” - in case you didn’t know this man has dodged death again and now has a heart (which he doesn’t talk about much).

Joe the “Scarecrow” - supposed to be the “brains” but now that he doesn’t work much he has become rusty, Deon the “Lion” - easy going and reluctant to fight and then wee Ernie as “Toto” the much loved Schnauzer.

With over 400 people registered for the race the “office” aka Deon’s van was buzzing with activity and excitement - runners getting scanned in, runners getting race numbers, runners forgetting race numbers and just the usual Thursday night drama.

Frank blew his first whistle at 7.15pm as an initial countdown to the race. As we headed to the start there were a few queries as to why the race was starting so low down - reply from the race director was to complain to the Prophet who had strategically placed a bin for filing such complaints.

As the whistle was about to be blown there was one man missing - one very important man - the Butcher - our very own Hill and Dale resident sweeper and Romeo - with seconds to spare he arrived on two wheels - too busy packing for his Boston Marathon and we wish him all the best as he “jogs” around this course in preparation for Chicago.

PS: Anyone looking to sponsor The Butcher he has space for one more tattoo on his left quad - terms and conditions apply.

Tollymore is a beautiful forest park with a superb back of the Mourne mountains - often compared to Yellowstone (if you know you know!) with plenty of ‘cowboys’ and ‘barrel racers’.

With over 330m of climbing in Tollymore the races start to increase in gradient and quad burning hills.

So, get ready for 450m climbing in Rostrevor this week. The finish is unique compared to most of the other races as you make that final ascend up the infamous “green rig”.

A lot of expletives, foaming at the mouth and nose as well as three potential ‘bokers’ makes scanning finishers a health hazard for our team.

Nadine, one of the cast of thousands representing Portadown Running Club, earned the ‘Hen Kelly Award’ for the best attempt at displaying what she had for dinner. One sight that definitely caught our eye amid the retching was the young man who appeared with one shoe on.

If anyone finds “Cinderella’s” missing shoe please return to the Prophet’s complaints bin.

After the race, the prize giving took place in the luxurious setting of the Burrendale Hotel and Spa where Connaire and his team looked after us very well.

The infamous Hill and Dale mugs were presented for a variety of nonsense reasons and have become so much in demand that even the broken handle ones are more highly sought than those with a handle - a box of mugs can be ordered from Mary Mackin.

Thank you to the team that makes this happen week in and week out, web administrators, marshals and volunteers.

Next up, we head to the epicenter of Down to the picturesque setting of Rostrevor, where Barry Og and David will be your glamorous hosts.

Make sure to bring full body kit, your number and enter before 9pm on Tuesday.

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